PROMPT Snark: What wrongs seem never to get righted?
SCENE
(The setting is an office in a city. Crete sits at her desk with a large cup of coffee. Carl sits down.)
CRETE
Hey Carl!
CARL
Hi there Crete? How was your weekend what did you do?
CRETE
Oh not much wrapped some Christmas presents and watched Hallmark movies alone with a case of wine.
CARL
I don’t think I’ve ever seen one of those movies what are they like?
CRETE
Are you serious Carl? Don’t you have a wife? What rock are you living under that she has never watched one while you were around.
CARL
She died in 1972.
CRETE
Boy am I a jerk. Please don’t call HR on me.
CARL
You’ve said worse to me.
CRETE
(Under her breath)
God I gotta get a new job asap.
(Louder)
So Christmas Hallmark movies..or Lifetime movies
CARL
Or one of those ones on that Candice woman’s network?
CRETE
(She stares at him.)
No! Bad Carl! We don’t talk about that woman.
CARL
Did you just talk to me like I was a dog?
CRETE
Moving on…can’t go back now. Well in all these movies there’s a big city girl that can’t get a date. She’s called to some small town that LOVES Christmas and somehow finds a burly man (or lady for the sapphics) and she abandons her city life and moves to the town.
CARL
Well that sounds sweet.
CRETE
Sweet?! It’s diabolical. Why do all these successful women have to give up their lives and move into the town from deliverance?
CARL
The town you described doesn’t seem like the town from deliverance.
CRETE
Mark my words Carl, you leave New York City, the banjos start playing.
CARL
That seems excessive. Though this is the most we’ve spoken in five years so maybe this is what you’re normally like.
CRETE
We sit next to each other!
CARL
You put AirPods in the second you get to the office.
CRETE
Yeah I gotta work on that I guess.
CRETE
I wish there was some kind of way for me to prove that this is fiction! What if I found the most Christmas-y small town and take our winter vacation to prove I’m capable of coming back.
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A cross between Iris Apfel, Miriam Margoles, Lucille Ball. But I am a devoted maximalist through and through. Although, as another inspiration once said
Style—all who have it share one thing: originality.
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